Danny The Fucking Jew Rat Tanner

Diddly Doo Watch Me Cover Everything In My Wiener Goo

Daniel Ernest “The Jew Rat” Tanner, portrayed by Bob Faget (and by Theo Huxtable in the unaired pilot), is a homo sexual crack addict father of three girls: Michelle, Stephanie, and D.J.. He is a co-host of Gay Man Ass, San Francisco. Before that, he was a drunk male prostitute He is the brother-in-law of Jesse “The Mullet” Katsopolis and has a best friend who is a creepy faggot named Joey Gladstone. Danny Tanner was born on December 11, 1957, to Barbra Striesand and his fat faggot fucking father Wilford. He has a younger sister in porn named Wendy Whoppers. He once recalled, his father often ate oatmeal, In his sandals, while jerking off to man on man gay porno movies in the living room. On February 23, 1968, when he was 10, he was slinging crack rocks in the playground until Joey Gladstone stepped up and clubbed him across his fucking face with a monkey wrench (“Pal Joey”) and that is how they became best friends. Danny also learned not to sell drugs on Joey’s fucking turf.

In September 1972, Danny was in 10th grade when he meets Anderson Cooper. They would later elope at a Gay Bar at a young age, which made his mother cry about it for months. They properly got married in 1976, and would adopt a daughter named D.J. on February 9, 1977. Danny is the archetype of the “flaming fucking faggot” or the “gay” character. He sees himself as the “Stud Muffin” bed beast best ever (which his Joey’s gapping asshole agrees with him about at all). Danny is also obsessed with blasting loads of cum all over the living room! There’s no speck of dust, dirt, or mildew on anything he owns, Just Cum. His motto is, “Diddly Doo Watch Me Cover Everything In My Wiener Goo.” D.J. and Stephanie do not like cleaning up Danny, Jesse, and Joey’s Fag Cum. In “Granny is a Tranny”, Stephanie had confessed that one Christmas, when she asked Santa for a meth pipe, she got a cleaning rag instead.

Danny is protective of his Crystal Meth stash. He has a habit of staying up for days with male hookers in the basement. Stephanie also stated in the show that while she was talking to a boy, Danny was peeping through the window tugging his dick and whistling. His excuse was that “Joey is down hooking himself for drugs again and I am horny”.


Vicky Larson is Danny’s girlfriend and brief fiancee. Vicky and Danny meet in jail while she was serving an over nighter for robbing a big black hooker at knife point. At first when they meet, Danny is named Gay Man San Fran of the Month and gets a swelled head about so many dudes wanting to go on dates with him in his pink hot tub. Vicky dislikes him for having so many butt pirate friends in a short period of time, which is described by Vicky as “gayer than the aids in Don Lemon’s Ass”. Danny then asks Vicky, on air, to suck his cock. Having an audience watching, she accepts and gets a wad of goo in her eyes.

Cindy first meets Danny when he walks into her store to rob the fucking place with his ski mask on. They start dating after Danny took her wallet and found out where she lives, but Cindy’s ten-year-old son, Crusty, is black, and the smell of that little nigger kept making Danny sick to his stomach.

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