Chris Hitler Harrison

Christopher Adolph Harrison (born July 26, 1971) is an American Gaylord Cult Guru and game show host, best known for his role as host of the joke television dating show The Bachelor since 2002, and its spin-offs Sluts and Guys who pretend to not be gay since 2003, Maxi Pads For Single Moms from 2010 to 2012, Bachelor in Paradise since 2014.

From 1993–99, Harrison worked as a male stripper in Oklahoma City. He was married to his college sweetheart, Victoria F. They have two children, which child welfare service took away from them. In May 2012, after 18 years of marriage, Harrison beat the shit out of his wife and announced he was into men. As of 2018, Harrison was confirmed to be dating numerous dudes most recently John Legend.

Chris Harrison Vows To Never Let Niggers Win In The Bachelor
Chris Harrison does this in front of the mirror in public gas station bathrooms before he jerks off to mens underwear catalogues in the shitter stalls. All while using the ketchup packets he stole from the station as lube for his cock.

Random Fun Bits About Chris Harrison

  • In 1992 He received a life time ban from Wendy’s fast food restaurants for sticking the straws up his asshole twirling them around in his poo and then putting them back.
  • Was a relationship organizer for Bill Cosby, R. Kelly, Jeffrey Epstein, and O.J Simpson.
  • Ordered in extra high bushes and tinted walls for the sets of The Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise so he can jerk off to the contestants with out them seeing or the cameras catching him.
  • While working at Wal-Mart in 1996 he was fired for getting a blow job from an elderly customer sitting on a fat scooter. It was not revealed if the customer was male or female but it was rumored it was a store Bernie Sanders frequented often.
  • Placed 17th at the 2003 American National Porcupine Raping Games in Syracuse. Beating out fellow celebrity Jim from the Progressive Commercials who placed 24th.
  • Says if he ever sees Survivor Host Jeff Probst walking down the street he is going to beat his goof ass fucking sensless. He says he will shit on the ground grab Probst’s faggot head and smear it in the shit make him fucking eat it all, then piss on him.

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Dean Spits out Chris Harrison’s Load after blowing him at the pool bar so he doesn’t have to sleep in his shitty van at night.

Dean Unglert was a contestant on the 13th season of The Bachelorette. During that fucking shitshow of a joke he fist started blowing Chris Harrison for muffins from the breakfast room He was eliminated in week 8 for personal reasons to attend a KKK rally.

He later appeared on the 4th season of Bachelor in Paradise. He quit in week 4 again for a White Pride Event. He returned again for The Bachelor Gay Mens Anal Assault Videos. He was eliminated in week 4 when he failed to fit Chris Harrison’s dick up his ass because it was limp. He returned again for the 6th season of Bachelor in Paradise. He quit in week 3 because his mom (RIP) came down from Heaven to smack him in the head for how stupid he was because all her friends in heaven knitting club were mocking her because of him. He returned in week 5 but quit in that same week.

Dean gained attention after appearing on Bachelor in Paradise, where he attempted to juggle two relationships, with Rosie Odonnel and Some Paki From Another TV Show, at the same time. Dean didn’t end up with either. As he got madly hooked on crack and sucking off Chris Harrison Every living second of the day.

What is your favorite memory from childhood?
When I was very young, my family lived in a mobile home. I remember sitting on top with my brothers watching hard core gay anal fuck me in the ass bareback and raw porno and eating cat shit out of the litter box while our nightly step dad ass raped us.

If you could go anywhere in the U.S., where would you go and why?
Pete Buttplugs House to suck his balls for hours and hours after he ass fucked his boyfriends diareahed up asshole. I highly doubt I could ever get tired of the sound of Buttplugs ass cheeks rippling together. Just the slapping thought alone gets me horny.

Describe your idea of the ultimate date.
Michael Jackson’s Never Land Ranch with Chris Harrison and meth AND ITS NOT EVEN CLOSE!!!!!!!!!!!!


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Diggy The Four Eyed Nigger

According to The Nebraska Farmers Almanac, Diggy was a senior cotton picker for Colonel and Bernie Sanders and has worked at companies such as Wendy’s and McDonald’s. His Myspace he recently started up a How To Rape White Women blog offering up advice and guidance on playing the race card, aptly titled Your White Ass Owes Me For Slavery. Fun nigger fact: he actually got his nickname Diggy because his classmates caught him digging up dead bodies in cemeteries to rape.”

In a 2017 chat with Nigerian Gay Nigger Nightly Nigger News, Diggy was proud to call himself an HIV and Hemroid Explosion survivor. He told the mag: “Bix Nood Muda fukin whitey gibs me foo”

Diggy, whose real name is actually Field Model Nigger T-1987634-09.4b, initially appeared on Season 13 of The Bachelorette, vying with other savage niggers to rape the Queen Gorilla Rachel. He was eliminated in week 4 for not understanding how to use the restroom facilities properly (he shit and pissed all over the fucking floor all the time). Even with a nigger-ish exit, Diggy quickly became a felon among the FBI and Americas Most Wanted who were happy to see him return to jail. It was there where he first connected with Lacey Mark a Jewish Pig and then went on to strike up a relationship with Chris Harrison. The couple seemed solid until one of his own species another nigger boon entered the picture, capturing his attention enough for him to accept her plate of watermelon. Diggy and the sheboon hit it off, but their situation went into friend-zone territory when they ran out of watermelon and crack. Diggy didn’t find everlasting free shit on reality TV yet, so why not go rob a fucking liquor store?


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Bachelor in Paradise To Spay and Neuter Nigger Contestants

On June 11, 2017 production was suspended indefinitely due to normal nigger behavior. It was reported that production allegedly filmed cotton picker field nigger DeMario Jackson in a sexual encounter with Corinne Olympios, who may have been passed out drunk or on a date rape drug. They didn’t want to state the obvious due to fears of being called racist. Peter Buttplug released a statement saying:

“We have become aware of this negros monkeyshines on the set of Bachelor in Paradise in Mexico. We have suspended production and we are conducting a thorough investigation of these allegations. Once the investigation is complete, we will take appropriate responsive action.”

On June 20, 2017, it was enforced that this did not occur and that the investigation was over and it appeared no misconduct occurred on the set. That’s the word from Jesse Jackson and Michelle Obama which released the following statement:

As we previously stated, we recently became aware of allegations regarding an incident on the set of Bachelor in Paradise in Mexico. We take all such allegations not serious because black people can do anything if you don’t accept it you are RACIST. Our internal investigation, conducted with the assistance of OJ Simpson, has now been completed. Out of respect for Jewish interests of those producers and bankers, we do not intend to release the videotape of the truth. We can say, however, that the tape caused a lot of vomit by those who seen it. Production on this season of Bachelor in Paradise will be resuming, and we plan to find a white male contestant who used the word black edit the clip and frame them for a racist action so this can be covered up”

Bill Cosby then released this response:

“We appreciate Jello and the swift and complete investigation by The Duke Rapist Investigation Team and Jussie Smollett did into the allegations of misconduct on the set of Bachelor in Paradise,” said a network spokesperson. “Given their results, the series will resume production, and will air this summer on some tv channel for homosexual and transgendered faggots. Kids say the darnest things and for all we know, no sounds like yes and she may of been HIV positive before meeting the demario Jello Pudding”

Host Chris Harrison tweeted:

“Fuck you DeMario you stinky nigger you stole my fucking playdough you brillo head. #BachelorNation Fuck You and to your entire nigger tribal monkey family.#herpes #gaypride #peterweberputhisballsinmmouth”

While neither Corinne Olympios nor DeMario Jackson returned to filming post-scandal, they will still appear in this season from footage shot before the scandal halted production. Due to this incident in the future if the show allows niggers they will all be spayed and neutered.


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