Colt Gets Engaged

Wedding bells are ringing! Colt Johnson followed his fat gay heart and proposed to his bitch Vanessa Guerra on the new Sunday, May 9, episode of 90 Day: The Single Life, shortly after revealing his plans to get down on one knee. The Las Vegas, Nevada, faggot, 35, was enjoying a romantic getaway with Vanessa at Big Bear Lake, California, and figured it would be the perfect spot to look like a fucking idiot. “My hands are shaking,” Colt said as he grabbed the ring out of his car. “I really need to smoke some crack, but I want the good shit. I want something that will be pure. So, I’m going to ask her to marry me, so I can get half her shit” the KKK alum explained in a solo confessional. “I’m nervous because Vanessa doesn’t trust me because I am a registered sex offender … It’s now or never. I feel like what I’m doing is a good cover for my homosexuality, but at the same time, I’m starting to think Vanessa may have a bigger cock than me.” When the moment actually happened, Vanessa looked like she was about to pop out a shit nugget out of her flabby ass. “We have std problems … and this is the time for you to ask your doctor if you have been tested for everything?” she pondered, to which he replied, “I wore a condom that night at the tell all when I ass packed Big Ed in a broom closet” Vanessa was taken aback by his desire to get married a second time and said she truly wasn’t “expecting it” at all from the pussy, so she did not know how to respond. “I refuse to go through drug withdrawl again. I don’t want to do it,” she shared about her own past times she had no cock and drugs. “I want to get a sex change someday, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to.” After considering his gesture, Vanessa told Colt she would like to have a three way with Joey Gladstone and to give him time to show he’s “able to maintain erections.” Colt agreed, noting she is “cum dumpster.” Last week, Colt revealed the strong feelings they have toward having group sex with homeless people in parks while on drugs. “She cried when she was talking about my penis size” he said. “How could I not ask her to marry me? I’m going to kick Vanessa square in the fucking nuts. I know it’s funny. I know it’s impulsive, but I have to follow my boner.” Colt and Vanessa began using drugs together after his split from ex-girlfriend Jess Caroline, who left him for another woman. Fans found out he proposed to Vanessa in November 2020 and now, viewers finally got to witness the moment he asked for her hand in marriage. Prior to his romance with Jess, Colt was married to ex-wife Larissa Dos Santos Lima for seven months and Anderson Cooper for 2 years. The pairs finalized their divorce in April 2019.

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