Chris Hitler Harrison

Christopher Adolph Harrison (born July 26, 1971) is an American Gaylord Cult Guru and game show host, best known for his role as host of the joke television dating show The Bachelor since 2002, and its spin-offs Sluts and Guys who pretend to not be gay since 2003, Maxi Pads For Single Moms from 2010 to 2012, Bachelor in Paradise since 2014.

From 1993–99, Harrison worked as a male stripper in Oklahoma City. He was married to his college sweetheart, Victoria F. They have two children, which child welfare service took away from them. In May 2012, after 18 years of marriage, Harrison beat the shit out of his wife and announced he was into men. As of 2018, Harrison was confirmed to be dating numerous dudes most recently John Legend.

Chris Harrison Vows To Never Let Niggers Win In The Bachelor
Chris Harrison does this in front of the mirror in public gas station bathrooms before he jerks off to mens underwear catalogues in the shitter stalls. All while using the ketchup packets he stole from the station as lube for his cock.

Random Fun Bits About Chris Harrison

  • In 1992 He received a life time ban from Wendy’s fast food restaurants for sticking the straws up his asshole twirling them around in his poo and then putting them back.
  • Was a relationship organizer for Bill Cosby, R. Kelly, Jeffrey Epstein, and O.J Simpson.
  • Ordered in extra high bushes and tinted walls for the sets of The Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise so he can jerk off to the contestants with out them seeing or the cameras catching him.
  • While working at Wal-Mart in 1996 he was fired for getting a blow job from an elderly customer sitting on a fat scooter. It was not revealed if the customer was male or female but it was rumored it was a store Bernie Sanders frequented often.
  • Placed 17th at the 2003 American National Porcupine Raping Games in Syracuse. Beating out fellow celebrity Jim from the Progressive Commercials who placed 24th.
  • Says if he ever sees Survivor Host Jeff Probst walking down the street he is going to beat his goof ass fucking sensless. He says he will shit on the ground grab Probst’s faggot head and smear it in the shit make him fucking eat it all, then piss on him.

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Chris Harrison Shoves Playdough Up His Fucking Asshole

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